The Latest Trends

Spotted on the streets and subways cars of NYC: Girls who are NOT under 18, are NOT superfit, are NOT at all tan, wearing no-joke midriff baring shirts. Hello. This is reserved for supermodels.

Also of note, a man at the Apple store on 14th looking very Less Than Zero in a blazer over a t-shirt, jeans, and bright yellow loafers. And of course, wearing a visage of privilege under his blonde 'do. On second thought, maybe he was more Spencer Pratt than Less Than Zero.

And to further tickle your fancy, a totally normal looking guy who I would never have noticed if I hadn't caught a glimpse of his t-shirt that said "Keep looking, I might do a trick." As if he's the kind of freak people stare at. This is the kind of shirt that oversized 14 year olds with badly dyed pink hair buy at Hot Topic - you know, like Perez Hilton back in the 90s. I only say that because I used to have beautifully dyed pink hair, and worked at Hot Topic.

Dear People Who Can't Hold It In: Stop Peeing on Strangers' Cars!

Twice in as many days I've had the pleasure of having my eyes alight upon a fellow publicly urinating near/on a parked car. Not tucked away in an alley or a corner, not on a tree in a secluded area, and not off any kind of beaten path, ho no, not for these cocky fellows, both of whom undertook this act of what can only be called civil disobedience at ungodly hours and in ungodly places - that is to say, not quite broad daylight, but not far off, given these long, nearly summer days; hours during which children still abound in the streets, during which the respectable young men and women of Williamsburg are taking their visiting parents to dinner. 9 pm-ish, the both of them; N. 7th near Bedford the one, N. 6th near Wythe the other - directly in front of the Lovin' Cup, he was. 9 pm! Have you really been drinking so excessively in a restroom-less venue that you're forced to the streets, nay, to the cars parked on the streets, the cars of unwitting strangers?? For shame!